The first and only time I was placed in school detention was in Grade 1.

My teacher, Mrs. Sikorski, kept me behind at the end of the day to finish an assignment. I didn’t complete it because I’d been too preoccupied with helping my friend Valerie, who'd struggled with it so I lost track of time and didn’t do my own work.

Mrs. Sikorski told my mom, who was waiting outside the classroom to take me home, that “Bernice is a kind girl but she needs to learn how to take care of her own responsibilities before she helps other people.”

Fast forward 20 years and I was chastised again – this time for helping a senior executive with a special request without asking my boss permission to do so. I honestly didn’t think it was a big deal to take 10 minutes out of my busy day to assist a VIP but my boss didn’t want team members to do extra work behind her back.

Here’s the thing…

I’m helpful.

It’s a trait I’ve had since I was a young child.

It’s a preference that is so strong that it’s hard for me to NOT be helpful.

When my teacher and my boss slapped my wrists, I felt devalued at a fundamental level. It made me feel extremely unhappy at work because I simply couldn't be authentically me.

Your Life Themes at Work

There’s a concept in the Harrison Assessment called Life Themes, which describes your top 5 strongest behavioural traits. You have such a strong preference for these traits that you almost feel like you have to exhibit them, like my compulsion to be helpful.

When one or more of your strongest traits are not used in your job (or the opposite is required), it will likely cause you discomfort, stress, or decrease your level of engagement at work.

For example, let’s suppose you prefer to work for a capable leader that you respect – but your supervisor doesn’t seem to have a clue…

You prefer to work with people who are frank – but the corporate culture is overly diplomatic…

You’re an honest person – but your colleagues are toxic backstabbers…

How would you feel?

Now let's examine a different situation, where your Life Themes are represented in your work.

I’ll use myself as an example. In my work as a coach, people come to me for help. They want it and expect it.

I get to do what’s most natural to me (i.e. being helpful) and I’m appreciated and rewarded for it, the consequence being that I love my work and am very good at it.

It’s a win-win!

Time to coach yourself

As a coach I’m not here to tell you what to do or give you advice. The answer lies within you. Discover it by asking yourself these questions:

1. What are your top five Life Themes?

2. To what extent are your Life Themes represented in your work?

3. If most or all of your Life Themes are present, celebrate!

4. If not, how does it affect you? Are you using the missing strong traits in other areas of your life? Is there anything you’d like to do to bring your Life Themes into greater focus?

If you’re not sure what your Life Themes are and you’d like to know, please contact me at info@eli-asia.com to discover how the Harrison Assessment can identify them for you, as well as your other key behavioural traits that impact your success and satisfaction in at work.

Developing poised, confident leaders.